Lovino's Curse
by SeriPhe08
Summary: Lovino Vargas had to be unlucky enough to get himself cursed three years ago. So far, he's been lucky that no one has found out that he's a girl half the time. But that changes when he's found out by a certain Spaniard. And the curse is the least of his problems, because of family Mafia ties. Will Antonio break Lovino's curse? Spamano. Rated M for possible smut in later chapters
1. Chapter 1: why me?

**A/N: Hello everyone. SeriPhe08 here. This is the first fan fiction story I've posted here on the FF. net site (or on any site for that matter), although I have read many by others here. I would like to start off by thanking my beta reader piratespain13 for putting up with me through this story. And for putting up with me in the future. She is almost as awesome as Prussia for her help.**

**Anyway, I hope this will fill your need for random Spamano goodness. Although Spain is not in the first few chapters, I promise he will eventually come into the picture. But the story must be set before the good things can happen. And speaking of those "GOOD THINGS" I will post a warning for M rated content.**

**Oh, and before I forget…. ahem**

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamono would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

**Please don't forget to R&R.**

**Well, I'm through with my little rant, so on with the story… I, SeriPhe08, present to you…. Lovino's Curse.**

CHAPTER 1

Name: Lovino Vargas

Age: 17

Birthday: March 17rd

Hair: Brown

Eyes: Hazel

Current thoughts: "Why me? Why does fate fucking hate me?"

I am standing on top of the toilet in the end stall, waiting for the stupid _idiotas_ to finish their business and leave. Two of the three are my personal last favorite people in the world. The other is just their idiot friend. But, if they find me, they will give me hell for hiding in the bathroom. The albino, Gilbert will probably dunk me in the toilet headfirst just for the sake of having a good laugh.

"Onhonhon." The stupid French pervert, Francis, is laughing, and trying to make something the Spaniard, Antonio, said into a dirty joke. Gilbert is laughing his ass off in return.

"Kesesese. Francis that's awesomely hilarious."

Bastards. Just leave already. I think to myself. My backpack is freaking heavy and I can't balance on this fucking toilet much longer.

The trio finally exit the bathroom just as I slip and wind up with my left foot drenched in toilet water. FUCK! I can't believe this shit. I strip my pants and squeeze as much water out of my jeans as possible. I am suddenly hit by a wave of stomach cramps. Ah hell! This isn't supposed to happen for another three days!

I throw jeans back on and do my best to maintain my composure as I bolt from the restroom and to the nurse's office. I stumble into the office and blurt at the nurse.

"Idon'tfeelwellsoI'mgoinghomefortheday. _Ciao_." Before racing from her office and down the hall to the nearest exit.

I unhook my bike from the rack and pedal furiously heading home. When I reach the house, I race upstairs to my room, slam the door and rush into the adjoining bathroom.

I feel like I'm fucking dying my whole body is throbbing so bad. As I puke into the porcelain bowl, I mentally curse my stupid fate.

...

Why the hell did that English bastard have to use me for his fucking magic test subject? Fucking Arthur. How the hell was I supposed to know that he would take my insult to his cooking personally and curse me? How the hell was I supposed to know magic was real? Why the fuck couldn't I have kept my mouth shut? Now for the past three years I've had to deal with being a fucking GIRL every other month...

I gladly beat the crap out of the eyebrow bastard after I found out he was the reason I suddenly turned into a girl. He apologized and said that he hadn't realized it would actually work. When I asked him to remove the curse or I would tell the French he liked him, he suddenly blurted out, "Don't tell that bloody frog that kind of shit. And I can't fix the curse. It doesn't have a counter spell."

Who the hell permanently curses someone over scones? I kicked the tea drinking bastard in the balls and was dragging him to Francis' house; but turned around and dragged him back to his own house when he threatened to tell everyone else about the curse on me.

No way in hell was anyone else going to know about Lovino Vargas turning into a fucking girl. No fucking way.

I grab a roll of cloth bandages from under my sink and start wrapping them tightly around my chest. I've learned that wrapping the cloth before the change takes place keeps my breasts to an unnoticeable size. Although it hurts like hell about halfway through the process. But if anybody notices that I suddenly grew boobs, I'll be the laughingstock of the fucking school. Thank god I don't sprout a freaking D-cup or something. I toss my school clothes, all except my boxers in a pile next to the sink and head to my bed. I'll wash my laundry later. Right now, all I want is my bed.

I decide to just sleep through the rest of the transformation like usual and I make sure to double check the lock on my door. No way in hell am I ever letting my _idiota_ younger twin ever fucking find out about this...he would slip up and tell the whole damn school. I crawl into my bed and curl into a ball pulling the red comforter over my head. If I'm lucky, no one will bother me until way later.


	2. Chapter 2: Nature of the Curse

A/N: Well, it's like this. I didnt feel that the first chapter alone gave enough information to fill thee need for a good read...so I posted the second chapter as well. Don't worry though. THe chapter slowly become more and more filling. Depending on my review rate, I may add chapter three sooner than I expect. Just so you know, I'm on a roll right now and have several more where these came from already typed.

-SeriPhe08

PS. Don't forget to R&R.

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamono would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 2

BANG BANG BANG!

"_Fratello_! Lovino~ are you okay?" I wake up to my little brother beating on my bedroom door. I glance at my alarm clock and see that school's been over for around twenty minutes. Just great. The first thing Feliciano does as soon as he gets home is come to wake me up and annoy me. Crap!

"What do you want? Stop beating my fucking door down!"

The knocking stops and Feli's voice whines though the door.

"I'm sorry, _fratello_. I heard from the nurse that you came home early and I was worried about you. Are you feeling okay?"

"I'm fine dammit. I just had a headache and didn't feel like suffering through study hall. Okay? Now leave me alone and let me go back to sleep!"

"Okay. I'm glad you're not sick, _fratello_. I'm going to go fix some food. I'm making manicotti for dinner tonight! Ve~ that sounds good..." His voice fades as he heads for the kitchen. And I roll back over in bed and groan. My whole body suddenly feels numb but at the same time like I'm being poked by thousands of tiny needles. You know the feeling; like when your foot falls asleep and you try to move it. Yeah that feeling...all over.

I try to focus on anything bit the tingling all over my body. I glance at the ceiling...that'll work. The ceiling is treated with some kind of fluffy paint that gives it texture. I start connecting the dots with my eyes. That looks like a tree, and there's a flower, and a mouse...

KNOCK KNOCK

I nearly jump out of my skin when my idiot brother knocks on my door again.

"What? I'm trying to sleep idiot!"

"Ve~ Sorry, fratello, but I have a favor to ask..."

"What?"

Well, I'm making pasta sauce and I don't have enough tomatoes. I was wondering if I can use some of yours."

What the f...? He came to annoy me about pasta sauce? And those are my special tomatoes... I ordered those seeds from Italy and they weren't cheap. It took forever just to get the greenhouse just right to grow them properly and I just harvested the second batch yesterday...no way is he using MY tomatoes...

A shiver runs through my whole body dragging me out of my mental rant. On second thought, if he'll leave me alone...

"Alright! But you can only use half of what I picked! You understand?"

He practically squeals in delight and I can imagine the goofy grin on his face.

"Really? Ve~ you're the greatest, _fratello_. The absolute best brother ever! Thank you!" And I swear I can hear him skipping down the hall away from my door.

I roll my eyes as the tingling in my body fades...

"Best brother ever huh? More like _sorella_ right now."

I lay in bed for about five more minute before deciding to get up. I walk to my dresser and pull out a pair of grey sweatpants, a red t-shirt, and a fresh pair of boxers. Then I head back to my bathroom. I need a shower. Not only did I miss my usual morning shower because of my brother, but I slipped into a toilet and I'm covered in sweat because of the stupid curse. I toss my clean outfit on the closed toilet lid, strip off my boxers and my wrappings, and step into the shower. I turn on the water set the temperature just right and let the water rinse all my troubles away.

Before the water starts to run cold, I grab my shampoo and start scrubbing my hair, being extra careful around my curl. No one in my family has ever found out exactly why we react to our curls the way we do, but apparently it's a genetic trait that skips generations on the Vargas side of the family. Needless to say, I can easily deal with the reaction when I'm male. Just turn the shower to the cold setting for a few minutes and presto! When I'm a girl, not so easy...and I'm not crazy enough to ask any girls how to deal with it...too fucking embarrassing. End of topic.

I finish washing my hair, grab the body wash, and wash the rest of my body. I will never get used to washing my female form. Even though it's still me its nerve wracking. I mean I am still fundamentally a man, dammit. The only girl I want to touch would be my girlfriend...if I ever managed to get one. That has been put on hold until I find a way to fix Kirkland's stupid ass curse.

I finish my shower and, after turning of the water, I dry off and toss the towel around my waist. Out of habit, I grab a smaller towel and work on my hair. When I grab the comb off the back of the sink, I catch sight of myself and immediately adjust the towel so that it's around my chest...fuck. I'm a scrawny guy, but somehow I turn in to a slightly sexy girl...How the hell can that be explained? I mean, yes, I am a junior in high school. Just like every other guy my age, girls are freaking hot. But how the hell can I be Sexy? I'm a BOY. Something must be wrong with my mind for me to think I look sexy as a girl... I think I should just stop thinking...

I comb my hair and slide into my clothes, snuggly wrapping my chest in a new set of bandages before tossing on the tee. I'll hand wash the other roll of wrap later...Feli would ask too many questions if it would up in the laundry. I grab my dirty clothes and toss them in my clothes hamper. I look at my tennis shoes and deliberate how to sanitize them...toilet water is still gross even if it's clean. I fish around under my bathroom sink and find some lemon scent disinfecting spray. I give the left shoe a very liberal coat and, just for balance, dust the right shoe as well. I seriously need to figure out if tennis shoes are machine washable...


	3. Ch 3: Potatoes, Tomatoes, and Phonecalls

****A/N: I've decided that, since I'm on a writing binge, I'm going to post another chapter. If my inspirarion holds, i might post another tomorrow as well. Here's my reasoning. I already have typed ro chapter 13 and as long as i keep a 10 chapter lead, I should have enough to at least have weekly updates for a while if my inspiration fountain suddenly has a drought.

So, a quick thanks to everyone who has read/followed/favorited and reviewed so far. 70 views on the first day of posting makes me feel so loved.

Enjoy the new chapter as a thanks everyone.

-SeriPhe

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 3

I can hear Feliciano in the kitchen and the smell of pasta sauce is wafting down the hall way as I exit my bedroom. I walk to the kitchen and my mouth hangs open in shock as I see that Feli isn't alone in the kitchen. A tall blond is standing beside my brother at the counter. He has a knife in his hand and is apparently helping cook by chopping ingredients.

"What the hell are you doing here, Potato Bastard?" I half yell and half growl at the sight of one of my least favorite people in the world.

The blond in question stiffens at my voice and turns from his chopping to face me with a sigh.

"Feliciano invited me to come over, Lovino. He would not take no for an answer so I am here."

Feli perks up.

"Luddy said he's never had real Italian pasta before, so I asked him to come have dinner with us tonight. He said yes. And he's really good at chopping! Ah! Luddy, I need the rest of the basil!" Feli starts babbling away as only he can, and I continue to glare at the blond as he turns to continue chopping the herbs.

Ludwig Beilshmidt is also a junior at our school. It's not like I have anything personal against the German, but it's more along the lines of the fact that, I can't stand the bastard because he is way too friendly with Feli. The icing on the cake is that his older brother is one of my tormentors at school. You remember the albino in the bathroom? Yeah. Gilbert just happens to be Ludwig's older brother.

I decide that I don't want to be in the kitchen with these two and head for the back door. Once off the back porch, I head for my sanctuary: my greenhouse. It's not a very large greenhouse; just one of those standard home gardener setups. You know, plastic walls on a PVC pipe frame. Mine is seven feet wide and fourteen feet long and is eight feet at the highest point. So yeah, it's not huge, but it perfectly houses my twenty fully grown tomato plants along with a little more room for my gardening tools, newer sprouts, and seed trays at the back.

I walk beside my plants and check on the fruit hanging on them. After checking the water and everything, I flop between two of the planters and lean against one of the large terra cotta pots. I reach up and pick one of the shiny red fruit from the branch of the large bush. I stare at it for a moment before biting into the firm skin, letting the juice run down my chin.

Eating tomatoes is like therapy for me. Something about the slightly sweet acidity calms me down and seems to wash all my worries away. And today, I have a hell of a lot of worries. I grab another tomato after I finish the first.

Today has been extremely stressful. It all started when I was late for school, and then I had to run into The Bad Touch Trio in the bathroom, and, for some reason, Eyebrows' curse had to act freaky and I wound up a girl earlier than the usual schedule. And to top it all off, the stupid Potato Bastard is in the kitchen with my brother cooking dinner…

"Argh!" I furiously run my hand through my hair in exasperation. I'm just about to grab another tomato from the bush when I hear Feli's voice call across the back yard.

"_Fratello_~ Dinner is ready! Let's eat~" that stupid sing-song voice of his is really irritating at the moment.

"I'll be right there!" I yell back. I double-check the fit of my clothes to make sure that I won't be discovered to be a girl by the German and my brother before heading back to the house. I head for the sink and wash my hands before flopping down in my usual chair at the table.

The small table is already set for three, and Feli sets a casserole dish on the oven mitt laying in the center of the table. My mouth waters as I gaze at the contents of the dish. Layers of tomato sauce and mozzarella atop cheese-stuffed pasta shells. Feli serves the dish onto our plates. Our family tradition states that the cook serves the food he prepared because he decides who deserves which part. Guests get served first too, so the German ends up with the first plate of food, and I get the second plate because the cook serves his plate last.

I watch an amusement as the German places his fork in his mouth. The Macho Potato apparently has really never had real Italian pasta before because his eyes go wide. Feli giggles noticing Ludwig's reaction.

"Ve ~ Luddy do you like it?"

"Ja." I roll my eyes at the faint blush on his cheeks when Feli looks him dead in the eyes. "It is gutte."

I finish my food and stand, taking my plate to the sink.

"I'll be back down to wash dishes later, Feli." I grumble as I stomp up to my room. As much as I'd like to stay downstairs and irritate the Potato Bastard, I don't think I can take my idiot brother's whining about me needing to be nice to his friends. Besides, I'm still tired from the stupid curse. I'll just take a nap in my room until the German leaves.

I flop back into bed and roll onto my stomach and sigh. Nothing could make this day any worse.

As soon as the thought enters my mind, I groan. My cell phone is buzzing from its place in my backpack. Only one person ever calls me on that phone. Shit. I rummage and find the phone before it switches to voicemail.

"What?" I growl into the phone.

The voice on the other end chuckles.

"Oh come now, my little Roma! I thought you'd rather take a job than my little Venici." I groan. Grandpa Vargas has the weirdest nicknames for us.

"Alright, Nonno. What's the setup?" I listen as I receive the details of my mission.

After I hang up. I go to my closet and grab my black suit with the navy shirt from the hanger. I dress in the closet and reach to the top shelf to pull down the locked box that rests there. I quickly spin the combination lock and open the case. I sigh as I tuck the gun into the back of my waistband. I adjust the jacket and grab my yellow-lensed cat eye sunglasses from the dresser on my way out of my room.

I sneak past the entrance to the kitchen and, right before I walk out the door, I call over my shoulder,

"Oi! Feli, I'm going out for a bit I'll probably be back after midnight. If not, I'll see you at school tomorrow!"

Before he can call back, I jump onto my Ducati and spin tires as I leave the driveway.


	4. Ch 4: Strange Meeting

A/N: In celebration of 50 visitors in less than 24 hrs, I'm posting yet another chapter. As I stated before, I'm on a roll right now and can afford to post multiple chapters in one day. I'm still at least 10 chapters ahead and wrote my latest in less than 20 minutes. so enjoy. Reviews will definately keep the inspiration fountain flowing. so please let me hear your thoughts. And don't worry Antonio shows up within the next three chapters and the story really takes off from there.

Thanks

SeriPhe

PS. The cover art for this story is something I came up with on my own. Feel free to comment on it as well.

**!Disclaimer!**

I** do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 4

As I zigzag down side streets, I mentally curse Nonno for being involved with the Italian Mafia and dragging me in as well, but, I made a deal that Feli would be left out of the whole mess as long as I do the dirty work. To tell the truth, even though my brother can irritate the hell out of me, I would do anything in my power to keep him safe. Seeing as it's technically just the two of us because Nonno's never around, the last thing I want is for him to become entangled in this world of killing.

A block away from my destination, I ditch my bike in an alley way, walking the rest of the way on foot. One of Nonno's henchmen meets me at my destination; a rundown looking pub at the edge of town.

"Good Evening, Sir" his sincerity makes me want to roll my eyes.

"So," I get straight to the point. "Let's do this. I have better things to do."

"Yes, Sir."

The few customers inside fall silent as I and grandpa's man enter the building. The bartender looks pale as we walk to the counter.

"G-good e-evening, um gentlemen. What can I do for you?"

"We're looking for Yao." The simple statement from the man beside me makes the bartender sigh in relief.

"He's in the back." The bartender gestures over his shoulder to indicate a door off to one side behind the bar.

We walk to the back room and open the door. The inside of the room is plush compared to the bar in the front. A feminine looking, Chinese man is relaxing on a couch. His long hair is pulled into a ponytail and he is wearing some kind of burgundy and gold, Oriental robes. What shocks me is the fact that he smiles when he sees us enter. And he seems sincere in his smile. Who the hell is ever happy to see the Mafia?

"Come in, come in. have a seat. Julius sent you right? How is my old friend? Still keeping things fun in the Underworld, aru?"

"Mister Vargas is quite well. He asked me to introduce you to his grandson tonight, Lord Wang. This is Mr. Lovino." I raise my eyebrows and give the henchman a glare.

"That's not what Nonno told me. He said I was helping with debt collection tonight."

Yao chuckles at my statement. "Debt collection? That's right, aru! Hang on a second."

The Chinese man rummages through a large trunk and pulls out a small box with calligraphy written on the sides and inlaid with jade and gold.

"Here you are, aru. What I promised Julius last time." He hands the box to the henchman and then turns to me. He leans in to whisper in my ear. "Mr. Henchman said grandson but you are a girl, right aru?"

My eyes widen in shock. How the hell? The Chinaman chuckles.

"Just kidding!" I shoot the man a glare that would freeze boiling water.

"If we have what we came for, there's no need to hang around here any longer." I huff as I cross my arms and turn on my heel to exit the room. "Let's go."

"Goodbye Lord Wang. Mister Vargas will appreciate this payment."

"Tell Julius if he needs anything else to let me know, aru!"

As the door closes behind us, I swear that in my head I can hear the Chinaman's voice echo.

_Be careful of strange curses Little Vargas._

I shiver as the night air hits my face when we exit the bar. Grandpa's henchman opens the door to the black sedan and I slide into the back seat. We still have four more collections on the schedule, and hopefully all of the others will be some of the regular set.

**A/N**: **Just so you know, China's appearance won't make much sense for quite a while, just let it slide for now. ALL WILL MAKE SENSE EVENTUALLY. ;-P**


	5. Ch 5: Late Night

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 5

All is going as planned until we reach the last collection call. It turns out that the bastard didn't want to pay up so he invited some of his friend's to join him. In the resulting confrontation, bullets flew.

In the sudden chaos, I dodged behind an overturned table and grabbed my handgun. The three thugs in my range of sight went down quickly, not dead, but thoroughly incapacitated. The henchman took care of the other four and together we turned on the leader of the mess, our original mark.

"Nice try" I growl coldly. "But it'll take more than a puny ass ambush to work against us."

The idiot starts laughing and I spin as I hear a gun cock behind us. I feel the bullet graze my left shoulder as I luckily spin _away_ from the downed man's line of fire. Cursing, I kick the gun from the man on the floor and crush his hand under my foot.

"Bastard! You shouldn't have done that!" I can feel my mentality snap as I enter the trance that comes from ten years of Grandpa Julius' training. I've been in a bad mood all day today and this shithead just pushed me over the limit.

I smirk as I grind the heel of my shoe into my target's hand. His screams are almost pleasing to my ears. His voice screaming in pain lifts a weight from my mind. How many times have I just wanted to scream in frustration of my fucked up life?

When the guy passes out and falls silent, I turn back to Grandpa's man and our target who's on the floor looking ready to pass out himself.

"Now then, Bastard," I smirk. "Shall we talk about your payment?" We collect the money in no time and, as we walk back to the car, my adrenaline rush fades. My shoulder is throbbing and I glance down to see the sleeve of my suit thoroughly soaked in my blood. Fucking wonderful.

As I flop into the back seat I look at the henchman. He is staring at me with a look of concern on his face.

"I know there's probably a fucking first aid kit in this car, so bring it here." I snap.

"Yes, sir." He opens the trunk of the car and returns with a small white case.

I grab the case out of his hand and tell him to drive back to the pub we were at earlier in the night.

While he is focused on the road, I strip off my jacket and, double-checking that he's not paying me any attention, slide my shirt halfway off. I pour some antiseptic onto the cut, holding back what could turn into a long string of profanities as it stings like hell. I use some gauze and bandages from the kit to wrap my arm and slide my now throbbing-like-hell arm back into my sleeve and button up the shirt. I leave the jacket off and lean back into the seat.

We arrive back at the pub in no time and I step out of the car and head in the direction of my bike. I look back and glance at the henchman.

"Get rid of the damn jacket for me, okay? And don't worry about mentioning it to Nonno unless he asks."

I stalk down the street and hear the car leave in the opposite direction.

I mount my Ducati and speed home. When I pull into the driveway, it's already after one in the morning and all of the lights in the house are off.

I quietly unlock the front door and slink upstairs to my room, passing Feliciano's room on the way. I can hear him snoring softly in his room and can't help but roll my eyes as I hear a faint muttering of "Pasta" occasionally interrupting the snoring.

I kick my shoes off as I enter my own bedroom and head for my bathroom. I turn on the cold water in the sink and rinse the blood from my shirt. I'll still end up trashing the damn thing later, but I need to get the blood out just in case Feli runs across the shirt before I can. I had a hell of a time talking my way out of a leg injury one time a few years back. If Feli wasn't so damn trusting, he might have figured out that a scrape from falling off my bike can't possibly cause that large of a blood stain or that clean of a rip…

I glance at myself in the mirror behind the sink. There are small amounts of red showing on the bandages I wrapped earlier. I sigh and decide that I'll change those in the morning when I take my shower.

After returning my gun to its proper place in the closet, I pull on a set of pajamas and slide between the sheets of my bed. I've discovered that, for some reason, my habit of sleeping nude isn't as comfortable as a female.

I roll onto my right side and fall asleep quickly.

**A/N: Don't hunt me down or send Russia after me...I know you all are getting tired of all these chapters with a certain lack of Antonio/Spain...Especially seeing as I promised Spamano…**

National Reviews:

**Romano: What the hell, Seri? It's just the fifth chapter and you're already trying to kill me off?**

**Me: Sorry Romano. But the fact that you get hurt will make the story better in the long run.**

**Romano: No fucking way! Edit that injury out! *tries to grab laptop**

**Me: wait! Here. Have a tomato! I'll give you more next chapter too! Just don't make alterations!**

**Romano: *takes really large bite of tomato* Fine… but the tomatoes better be the best…**


	6. Ch 6: Tardy

****A/N: I happen to be near a Wi-Fi hotspot right now, so I'm going to go ahead and post this. Anything that can save me from accidentally overcharging my mobile phone bill is worth it. So, here's a chapter because I'm being cheap.

-SeriPhe08

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 6

I awake to the annoying-as-hell sound of my alarm clock buzzing. Is it six thirty already? Damn it. I only got four and a half hours of sleep. Before I think, I roll to my left to smack the damn thing, only to end up cursing in pain. I rolled onto my injured shoulder. Well, I'm fully awake now at least…

I sit up and smack the alarm clock off properly this time. I rub the sleep out of my eyes and stumble off to the bathroom. I strip and unwrap all of the bandages on my chest and set to work on my shoulder. The bandages are considerably more splotched than at two this morning.

I carefully peel off the last layer and wince as the gauze sticks to the injury. I grab a washcloth from the nearby shelf and cautiously clean the skin around the wound. I apply antiseptic and a new bandage. I grab a box of plastic wrap that I keep under the bathroom sink for times like this and wrap some of the clear cellophane around the bandages. Checking the waterproofing, I step into the shower and let the hot water flow.

I finally step out of the shower when the water starts to cool off. I wrap a new set of bandages around my chest after toweling off and remove the plastic from my arm. Grabbing a burgundy button-up shirt and a pair of khakis from the closet and a pair of boxers out of the dresser along with pair of socks, I dress quickly and run a brush though my hair. I grit my teeth and quickly slick down my curl; doing my best to ignore the shiver that runs down my spine from the action.

I slide my feet into my tennis shoes, grumble at the fact that they still need a proper cleaning, and grab my backpack from the floor beside my bed. I quickly head back to the bathroom and fish my cell phone from the pocket of my pants from last night and stuff it in the side pocket of my bag, after placing it on vibrate of course.

I head downstairs to the kitchen when I read my alarm clock. It's already seven twenty and classes start at eight o'clock. I grab some bread and make my lunch for the day. Feli will take whatever pasta is left over from last night. He is friends with just about everyone and some teacher will let him use the microwave in the staff room. On the other hand, I'm out of luck on a microwave and there is no way in hell I'm eating school lunch. So for me I, make a _margherita _sandwich.

I turn on the broiler in the oven and start layering a freshly sliced tomato and spinach and basil onto the bread. I top the layers with a piece of mozzarella and stick it under the broiler to melt the cheese. After a few minutes I toss the top on my sandwich, wait a minute, and jerk the sandwich out of the oven before it can burn. I wrap a paper towel around my sandwich and toss it in a brown paper bag along with a fresh tomato. I stuff the brown bag into my backpack and, after making sure the oven is off, race out the door, locking it behind me.

Judging by the fact that his bicycle is already gone, Feli has probably been at school for almost twenty minutes. He likes to get there early to see all of his friends. I hop on my own bike and start pedaling. I wince as my shoulder throbs when I put pressure on my left arm, but I endure. Walking would make me late, and the last thing I want is a trip to detention for being tardy to my first class. I would take my Ducati to school, but I didn't sign up for student parking in time to get one of the limited spaces.

By the time I get to the school it's ten minutes to eight. That will give me enough time to get to the other side of the school and properly settled into my first period class.

Correction. I _should_ have had enough time to get to my first period class. What I did not expect was running into the Bad Touch Trio as I rounded a corner. I did not simply meet them. I literally crashed head first into Antonio Fernandez Carriedo; knocking him down and landing on him in the process.

"Shit!" I scramble to my feet, wide eyed with panic.

"Tonio, are you alright, _mon ami_?" Francis chuckles softly as he and Gilbert help Antonio to his feet. Antonio laughs as he answers.

"_Si_, I am fine Francis." He dusts himself off and cocks his head to look at me.

"Ah. Lovino! You should be more careful near corners. Even if you are late, you shouldn't run in the halls either." He states it like I don't know that already.

"I think_ petit _Lovino here wanted to get _in touch _with you before class, Tonio. Even at the risk of being late to first period."

"Kesesese~! I think little unawesome Lovino here _is_ late for class!" Gilbert chimes in just as the bell for first period rings.

"Shit." My shoulders sag slightly as I realize that I'm in for a detention from my evil first period teacher.

"Well, if I'm late for class, so are you three bastards!" I growl

Francis and Antonio smirk at Gilbert as he gasps.

"_Verdammdt_! He's right! A moment of less awesome for the awesome me. And that's total unawesomeness for you guys. Let's go!" The three take off down the hall and I do the same in the other direction.

I take a deep breath as I open the door to my first class.

"About time you decided to show up Mr. Vargas." Mrs. S, my first period Government and Economics teacher, glares over her glasses. "Detention after school for half an hour. Now sit down and open to page fifty nine." Geez. She's too damn strict. I'm only three minutes late.

By the time first period is almost over, I am ready to fall out of my chair. Not only is the fact that I only got four hours of decent sleep starting to affect me, but so is the fact that I skipped breakfast and also have a shoulder injury. Plus, Mrs. S is droning on about the pros and cons of democracy. I nearly raise my hand to ask for a bathroom pass when, lucky for me, the end of class bell rings.

Thank God! I pack up and rush to the nearest restroom which is thankfully unoccupied. I hide quickly in a stall and check the bandage on my arm, there's only a few small spots of blood on the bandage. I grab my lunch out of my backpack and pull out the tomato. It looks a little bruised from my tumble earlier, but like hell I care. I demolish the tomato in no time and sit for a moment on the back of the toilet. My head clears up a little and I exit the stall, wash my hands, and head for my next class. My next class… oh fuck. I have gym.

**A/N: Woohoo! Antonio makes his speaking debut. He has more important parts next chapter. And his role will only get better. Hmm. What could go wrong in Gym?**

National Reviews:

Spain: Roma, are you okay? You crashed into me pretty hard there.

Romano: I'm fine tomato bastard. *grabs tomato from basket Seri is keeping nearby in case of his temper*

France: Onhonhon. Espagna. You got some contact there for a moment, oui? Tres Bien.

Prussia: Ah! Seri! That vas unawesome. You made the awesome me say that I had a moment of unawesome. Not cool. Ze awesome me is always awesome.

Me: *rolls eyes* Yes, Prussia. You are awesome. Undeniably. *feeds Gilbird some thinly sliced apple* I'll make it up to you in a later chapter, 'kay?

Romano: Just fucking great. That means the whole BTT will be in that one...

Me: *whispers to Romano* Don't worry. It will be several chapters before I write that one. Here. *hands Romano another tomato*


	7. CH 7: Gym Class

A/N: Edit Note. A thanks to **Sesi and Siku Braginskaya **for correcting me on Russia's last name. I have now corrected this.

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 7

Two days ago, the prospect of gym class wouldn't have phased me in the least. I had put off taking gym for as long as possible, but this semester I had no choice. The board of education requires that every student take at least one semester of physical education in their high school career. I was hoping to take gym 1 my last semester of senior year, but my schedule was screwed up forcing me into the gymnasium the first semester of my junior year.

So here is my predicament: I am supposed to change in the boys' locker room, in plain sight of twenty something high school guys without them figuring out the fact that I'm not physically just another guy at the moment. I was supposed to come up with a plan by next Monday…

High school guys will not let the sight of a shitload of bandages wrapped around someone just go unnoticed. Someone will fucking say something. I can't come up with a good story off the top of my head either… Shit. Shit. Shit. This is not going to work out well…

I suddenly have an idea. Maybe I can change in the restroom in the gym… after all, I keep my spare gym clothes in my backpack. Okay. This might just work.

I manage to change in one of the bathroom stalls and I stuff my regular clothes in my bag, being careful not to crush my lunch in the process. When I sit on the bleachers that line the wall and wait for the coach to announce the start of class, I glance at the set-up of the gym today, that's when I realize that Fate does in fact have a grudge against me and that it must want me to suffer. There are volleyball nets set up down the middle of the floor.

That's just fucking wonderful. I get to play volleyball with my shoulder already aching. This class is going to be hell on earth. This can't get any worse.

As soon as I think that, the coach announces that we will be playing DOUBLES volleyball and starts to assign partners.

"Williams and Jones, Honda and Hedervary, Vargas and Carriedo, Steele and Kavanagh, Braginsky and Laurinaitis, Kinneas and Tilmitt…" the coach continues naming pairs but I've stopped listening.

Why the fuck do I have him as my partner. Of all the people in this class, why the hell is my volleyball partner Antonio Fucking Carriedo?

Said Spaniard is smiling brightly as he walks over to me and starts rambling about how much fun it's going to be to play with me.

"Fuck off. Let's just get this over with." His smiles fades slightly at my words but quickly returns.

"Aww. Don't be like that Lovi~. It'll be fun. Come on!" he practically drags me onto the court.

"What the hell?" _Did he just give me a damn nickname?_ "My name is Lovino. Three syllables Lo-vi-no. _Comprende_?"

"_Si_. Okay. Lovino. Now let's play!"

Antonio take the first serve and is countered quickly by Matthew Williams. The ball heads to me and I wince as I counter it back over the net. It flies to Alfred who whacks it with force to Antonio.

Antonio sees the ball coming at high speed and dodges away instead of spiking it back. The ball hits the floor and bounces clean to the wall behind the bleachers. The first point goes to the opposing pair.

"What the hell was that? You could have returned that!"

"_Si_. But I like my wrists in one piece." Antonio chuckles. "That ball would have done me in,_ amigo_. Alfred doesn't know how to hold back."

I glance over at our opponents to see Matthew glaring at his brother while telling him to calm down and restrain himself. Alfred is laughing throughout Matthew's scolding.

Antonio retrieves the ball from under the bleachers and we prepare for another round.

Three rounds later, the score is three to one in favor of Alfred and Matthew. I've managed to spike back five of Matthew's balls and my head is staring to hurt along with my shoulder feeling like it's on fire. My lack of sleep is seriously messing with me.

When Alfred scores the next point, I take a moment to rush to the restroom while Antonio hunts the ball. I splash some cold water on my face and curse when it feels like ice. I head to a stall and lean against the door as I strip my gym tee. There's a lot of blood on my shoulder bandages and I sigh as I realize that I'm going to need to change them.

That means I'm going to have to see the nurse who will ask about the damn bandages wrapped around my chest. And that will lead to Hell on Earth for me. Fuck.

Maybe I can just leave like I did yesterday. But then I'll have to bike home…

This isn't going to work out…

Then an idea strikes me. I start to unwrap some of the bandaging on my chest and get enough to rewrap my shoulder. I tear the piece off and sit on the toilet as I begin to unwrap the soiled bandages. I'm too caught up in my work to realize that the stall door wasn't shut properly and has opened halfway and that someone else has entered the restroom.

I freeze as I hear him speak.

"Ah, Lovi? You've been gone a long time and I decided to see if you were alright. Are you feeling oka…?" His voice trails off and his green eyes go wide as he catches sight of me through the open stall door.

My hands have blood on them, I'm wrapped partially in bandages, there are some bloody ones on the floor, and I'm pretty sure there aren't enough bandages left on my chest to hide the contours of my breasts. My random verbal tic appears as I realize that I've been discovered.

"CHIGII!"

**A/N: YAY! Finally Antonio comes into the picture in a majorly problematic way for poor Lovino. How is Lovi going to handle the situation?**

National reviews.

Me: Romano and Spain are in a light state of shock from that last paragraph set, so I'm going to ask my honorable mentions what they think.

Canada: You must really like me Seri. I'm glad that you made me a character in your story.

America: Why am I getting scolded by Canada in this story? I'm the hero. I should have spoken lines!

Me: *sighs* America… you'll get more appearances in later chapters. It wouldn't be very hero like if you injured Spain on accident, so I had Canada scold you.

Russia: Ah. I get to play on the same team as Lithuania, da?

Lithuania: *shaking slightly* mmm. why me?

Japan: Thank you very much for mentioning me.

Hungary: Where is the yaoi in this story? I thought you said it was rated M.

Me: *small sigh* sorry. I'm working my way up to that. When I do, I'll send you and Japan copies okay?

Hungary: You better *eyes her frying pan*

Japan: *blushes lightly* Arigatou gozaimasu.

Me: By the way. Free virtual pasta and tomatoes to those readers who can figure out where my other volleyball pairs came from. PMs and Reviews will both work.


	8. CH 8: Busted

A/N: Thanks to all my rewiewers, followers, and visitors for this story so far. As I post this, my traffic graph is showing 815 visits for the entire story so far this month. I love y'all. I'm currently typing chapter 18, so I'm still managing my 10 chapter lead. YAY! But, I do jave a small kink in the piping of my inspiration fountain... Give me some review love to fix the pipes. I'm also working up some companion fics for this story...so look forward to more stories from me...

P. Pasta and tomatoes to those who caught my references to other works in the last chapter. My volleyball pairings were inspired by characters from Final Fantasy 8 and Fifty Shades of Gray by E L James.

-SeriPhe08

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 8

"CHIGII!"

"_Dios mio_, Lovi!" Antonio rushes forward at the sight of my bloodied appearance. I manage to kick the stall door closed in time to keep him from joining me in the stall. I hear him step back and mutter something in Spanish when it makes contact with some part of his body. Serves him right for sticking his damn nose in my business.

"Keep out and mind your own damn business, Bastardo!" I snap.

"Ah, but Lovi, shouldn't I go get the nurse? You're bleeding!" His voice sounds strangely muffled as he speaks. Before he can head for the nurse, though, I fling the stall door open and grab him by the back of his shirt, pull him into the stall and, before he can react, slam the door shut again and shove him towards the toilet.

It's too late for me to hide now, so I might as well make sure that he'll keep his damn mouth shut. I stand with my back to him for a minute before slowly turning to face him. What I see makes me want to bust out laughing, but at the same time makes me regret slamming the stall door in his face.

He has the front of his gym shirt pressed to his nose and I realize the cause of his muffled tone moments before. I literally slammed the door _into_ his face… His nose is bleeding and doing a good job of soaking through the part of his shirt h has pressed to his face.

"Geez. I know you're an idiot, but how do you manage to head anywhere nose first? Isn't it a reflex to at least try to throw your hands up when something heads for your face?"

He glances at me while trying to staunch his dripping nose.

"_Lo siento_, but I wasn't thinking you would kick the door closed and I panicked when I saw all that blood."

"Whatever. As punishment for sticking your nose where it doesn't belong, you're my pass out of class now."

Seeing his confused look, I sigh and explain.

"I'm not going to the nurse. She'll ask too many damn questions, so you're leaving early today and I'm going to 'escort' you home. Okay?"

"_Si_. I get it. But I have one question? Why don't you want the nurse to treat you?"

It takes me a moment to realize that he apparently hasn't realized I'm not a boy right now. This idiot is priceless.

"I'll explain once we get out of school, bastard. Now give me a second and I'll take you to the nurse." I make quick work of rewrapping my shoulder properly and snug my chest wrap before tossing my gym shirt back on. I don't worry about getting blood on my shirt because if anyone asks, I can blame it on Antonio's bloody nose.

I lead the idiot from the bathroom and out to the coach, who gasps at the sight of Antonio still clutching his nose.

"Coach, I'm taking Antonio to the nurse's office. He ran into one of the stall doors."

"Alright Mr. Vargas. Both of you take your bags, too. Class is out in fifteen."

Antonio and I grab our bags and head down the hallways to the nurse's office. Before we get all the way to the nurse, I turn to him and glare.

"Remember, bastard," I hiss. "Don't say anything about my shoulder to the nurse or I'll finish breaking your nose…"

"_Si, si_. I understand." His eyes glint like he wants to laugh at my threat.

As we enter the nurse's office, the nurse glances up from her desk and gasps before leading Antonio to a stool beside her desk.

"Mr. Carriedo, what did you manage to get into this time? I notice Mr. Bonnefoy and Mr. Beilshmidt aren't here though, so it wasn't a fight, right?"

"No, _Señora_. I was unlucky enough to run into a bathroom stall door. This time was me not paying attention." He chuckles and the nurse seems to believe the story, as stupid as it actually sounds.

"What am I going to do with you Mr. Carriedo? Just last week you were in here for tripping into a trash can. And before that for slamming you finger in your locker. You really need to start paying attention more."

What the hell? Is the idiot really accident prone? No wonder the coach and nurse both believed the story so quickly.

My head is starting to hurt again, along with my shoulder, so I speak up, interrupting the nurse.

"Is there any way I can go home for the day? I'm still not feeling well from yesterday."

The nurse turns to me and looks me over.

"Well Mr. Vargas, you do look a little pale. But it's not really a good thing to miss your classes two days in a row, you know."

"All I have left for today is lunch, Geometry with Mr. B, and study hall. And today is Friday, so I might as well have double study hall."

The nurse nods at that. Every one of the faculty knows that all Mr. B does on Fridays is put a random educational video in and call it extracurricular study.

"Very well, Mr. Vargas. You may leave for the day, but if you don't mind, could you get Mr. Carriedo home as well? According to his records, he lives near you."

"No, _señora_. I don't mind at all." I smile at the nurse. Ladies love my smile.

"Thank you Mr. Vargas. Now here are your slips. And you two should probably go pick up your regular clothes from the gym." The nurse hands over two yellow slips of paper and shoos us from her office. "Both of you feel better over the weekend."

We walk down the hall and I look at Antonio.

"Well, go get your clothes, Bastard. I've got mine in my backpack."

Antonio laughs. "I've got mine in my bag too. I lost the combination to my gym locker a while back and haven't gotten around to asking the coach for a copy yet."

"Fine. Let's go get changed and leave already." I head for the nearest bathroom and walk into the first stall locking it behind me. Antonio starts stripping down in the open. I stuff my gym clothes in my bag and walk out to see Antonio standing in his tight black jeans and still shirtless with his back to me. My mouth goes dry as the thought of "Damn he's hot!" runs through my head before I quickly push it away with a thought of "He's a GUY dammit and so are you! Even if it's not in a physical sense right now…"

I head for the sink and wash my hands, looking anywhere but the sexy, I MEAN NOT SEXY, Spaniard. He has gauze taped to his nose dammit. I see a flash of red out of the corner of my eye and when I turn back around, he is wearing a red t-shirt with a yellow diagonal stripe.

Was he wearing that shirt this morning? I can't remember.

We walk out the school doors and I unhook my bike right as the bell rings to announce the end of second period.

**National Reviews**

Spain: *reads over chapter* You don't really think I'm not able to realize a girl when I see one, do you Seri? *looks depressed*

Me: Wait. That's not how I see you at all! I can explain. You see. You're freaked out that Romano is covered in blood at first, and then you're in pain from your nose, so you don't notice. Plus there's the fact that I didn't make Romano into a well endowed female.

Spain: OH! That makes sense, chica

Romano: I think Spain is just a dense bastard. I like that you made him a klutz. Serves him right for sticking his nose in my business.

Spain: Lo siento Romano. You didn't need to take out your anger on my nose. After all, it says here that you think I'm actually sexy.

Romano: it says NOT SEXY, dammit. And it's only right that I busted your damn nose. You busted me when I was trying to hide my secret.

Spain: Dios mio! That's funny.

Romano: What are you laughing about?

Spain: *points to chapter title* Seri wanted it to have a double meaning!

Me: *chuckles at my witty humor*

Romano: That sucks, how is that funny? Mph!

Me: *glares at Romano and shoves tomato in his mouth* I thought it was funny, so shut up!

**Tune in next Tuesday for Chapter Nine of Lovino's Curse : Explanations.**


	9. Ch 9: Explanation

Random A/N: Based on my traffic stats, I'm betting that at least one of the readers, if not twenty, went back and looked at chapter 6 to see if I even described what Antonio was wearing in the scene where Lovi crashed into him. For those that didn't double check, I actually didn't mention his clothes at all until last chapter. So free virtual tomatoes to the avid detail hunters. Everyone gets free cookies for sticking with me this far though.

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 9

We walk down the sidewalk in silence. I'm pushing my bike because Antonio apparently always catches a ride with Gilbert, Francis, and Ludwig every day, so if I ride my bike I'll leave him behind. Not that that would be a bad thing, but my shoulder is throbbing, and I don't want to cause myself any unnecessary pain.

I glance to the side and notice that the Spanish bastard is spacing out while he's walking. Just as I'm about to say something to him about him being a space case, he trips on a crack in the sidewalk and manages to catch himself before he can face-plant the cement.

"Jeez, you really are an accident prone bastard aren't you?" I scoff as he picks himself up.

"_Lo siento. _I just have a knack for it I guess." He chuckles as he continues walking to my right. There is a small pause and he asks the question I've been waiting for.

"So, Lovi, why did you not want the nurse to know about your shoulder?"

I sigh. He is a spaced out idiot until you want him to be…

"Where exactly do you live, idiot?"

He rattles off an address one street further than I'll have to go to get home.

"Fine. I'll explain once we get to my house then, dammit. I live closer to the school than you do so we'll go there." Seeing his puzzled look, I add. "It's easier to explain indoors."

We finally make it to my house and I lean my bike against the garage door. I start to unlock the front door and notice the brunette bastard staring at my Ducati in awe.

"What? You've never seen a motorcycle before? If you want me to explain, you had better hurry up and get inside or I'm locking you outside and you can just go home."

Antonio snaps out of his daze and rushes into the house ahead of me. I roll my eyes and lock the door behind me. I toss down my backpack, kick off my shoes and head for my room. I hear Antonio pulling off his own sneakers and know that he's following me when I hear him on the stairs. I enter my room and decide to see how long it takes Antonio to state the obvious.

"Sit on the bed. I'll be right back." I grab a fresh shirt out of my closet and groan at the thought of how much laundry I'm going to need to wash later. I have five dirty outfits that are heading straight for the washing machine later. Along with the pair of shoes I left at the front door.

I toss off my dirty shirt in the bathroom and eye the pile of dirty bandages beside the sink. I'll need to wash those too. Dammit. My life has suddenly become centered around the fucking washing machine.

I grab fresh bandages and antiseptic from under the sink and stalk back to the bedroom. Antonio is watching me as I walk over to my desk and flop in the chair there. I start unwrapping my bandages and smirk as his deep green eyes suddenly go wide and his face goes red before he averts his eyes.

"Um. Lovi? _Lo siento_. I didn't notice earlier, but are you by any chance a, well, are you actually a girl?"

I roll my eyes at the slowness of his thought process.

"You just fucking realized that fact, bastard? Really? I was within three feet of you earlier and half naked. And you just now grasp that I'm a fucking girl?"

"Ah, lo siento. It's just that I was more worried about the fact that you were bleeding and covered in bandages. And then I was more worried about my nose. It really hurt when you hit me with the door." He is still looking anywhere but at me.

"Ah, well... The truth is I'm not really a girl so you don't have to be so fucking embarrassed, idiota." I growl at him. "I'm just unlucky enough to be fucking cursed."

"Cursed?" Oh my god. I can almost see a fucking question mark floating over his head.

"Yeah. Cursed. Long story short, I pissed off somebody and they used me as a test subject for black magic. So now, every other month I get to live my life as a fucking female. End of story. Needless to say, if the nurse found out that a student who is registered as male suddenly shows up in her office as a female, all hell will break loose. And I personally don't want to be poked and prodded by fucking scientists trying to figure out how the laws of fucking nature suddenly don't apply to me."

"Well now it makes sense why you didn't want to let the nurse check you out. But Lovi, that injury looks really bad. Maybe you should let me take a look at it?"

"And what the hell qualifies you to be a doctor?" I snap at the Spaniard as he walks over to where I'm seated and starting to unwrap my shoulder.

"Um? Well, I help out at my Papi's animal clinic a lot, so I've taken care of a lot of injuries on animals. So veterinary knowledge is better than nothing, right?" He smiles at me and I glare in return.

"Fine, but if you make it worse than it already is, I'll seriously make sure to finish breaking your nose." I slide in my chair so he can see the full extent of my injury.

"_Dios mio_, Lovi. This is horrible. How did this happen to you?"

"It doesn't fucking matter how I got it. Can you get it into better condition, or not?"

"I can make sure it doesn't get any worse. But it won't get better if you don't let it heal. You shouldn't use your left arm too much or it won't be able to heal. Actually, Lovi, you should have stayed at home with this bad of a wound." Antonio looks a little disappointed for a moment and then the look on his face changes to something similar to concern.

"Lovi? You played volleyball with your shoulder like this?"

"_Si_." I mumble the answer. Something about the look he is giving me makes me want to crawl under the desk and out of sight. "If I told the coach I was injured he would have sent me to the nurse…"

"Well that explains why you hid in the bathroom during gym class. You didn't feel well because you were straining your shoulder, _si_?"

"That and the fact that I had a damn headache." I snap at him before I realize that I've just opened up a new damn topic to be questioned about.

"Your head was hurting, too?" His concern is evident in his eyes.

"It's no big deal, bastard. I just didn't get enough sleep last night." I explain. "I got in from my part time job around fucking two this morning."

"Your parents let you stay out until two?"

"Drop the topic now or you'll regret it." The topic of mine and Feli's parents is off limits. "Just understand that I don't usually work on school nights. My boss forgot that and made me come in. End. Of. Story." I must have glared exceptionally hard because he drops the topic quickly and turns his attention back to my shoulder.

I curse as he pours a large amount of antiseptic into the open wound.

"That hurt like hell you fucking bastard!" I smack him upside the head with my right hand.

"_Lo siento. Lo siento_. It had to be done. If not it would get infected and then you would have no choice but to go to the hospital or lose an arm." He rubs the side of his head tenderly.

I pale at that thought and grit my teeth as he finishes wrapping my shoulder.

**National Reviews**

**Spain: Roma, now that I think about it, are you really a girl? You did seem to look way too cute in that dress when you were little!**

**Romano: Hell no! Seri is just picking on me dammit! *glares at SeiPhe* And no way in hell was I ever fucking cute!**

**Me: Umm, Romano. Half of how I came up with this story was because I thoguht you were cute in that dress too..**

**Spain: Ah! You understand what I mean, Seri. He was adorable, si?**

**Romano: The hell? That does it! I'm removing this story! Where's the damn delete key? *grabs laptop from SeriPhe08***

**Me: Romano, no! I'm sorry, please, don't press that button! I'll right in lots of tomatoes for you next chapter. I promise!**

**Romano: … *hands back laptop and pouts* fine, but there had better be a lot of them...**

**Me: *sighs in relief* whew. Thank you.**

Stay tuned for the next chapter: "**Tomato Sandwiches**"


	10. CH 10: Tomato Sandwiches

A/N: To all my readers, "Y'ALL ARE AWESOME!" My traffic stats are showing me amazing things. And to my followers, Favoriters, and reviewers Thank you very very much... I have been having a bit of writers block on chapter 19, but you guys have started the inspiration fountain flowing once more. Yes, I'm a little further behind on my 10 chapter lead than I would like, but I am also making a few side stories for this series. Be on the lookout for the story of the BTT meeting for the first time (I'm already working on that one), along with a possible USUK, GerIta, PruCan, and a humor fic with Japan and Hungary that will all be based in the Lovino's Curse AU.

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 10

After Antonio finishes wrapping my shoulder, I start unwrapping my chest only to have the bastard start blushing as he spins to face the opposite direction.

"Hey, Bastard. I thought I told you I wasn't really a girl. So stop the damn blushing already dammit!"

"Sorry Lovi. But even if you're not really a girl, you still are physically a girl and I really shouldn't be staring at a nude girl if I'm not her boyfriend."

I feel a blush creep to my own cheeks at his sincere care for my, for lack of better terminology, feminine virtue.

"Whatever bastard! Just hand me the rest of the damn bandages so I can rewrap my chest!"

The roll of bandages practically appears in my hands before Antonio spins away again. I rewrap my chest and slide on my fresh t-shirt.

"Alright, stupido. You can turn back around. I'm decent."

He turns around and, as I look at him I realize that he looks hilarious, and double over in laughter.

"Um, Lovi? What's so funny?" The puzzled expression on his face is just making the situation worse.

"You dammit! Go do something about the damn gauze hanging out of your nose. You look ridiculous."

"Eh?" his hand flies to his nose and he makes a beeline for my bathroom. He comes out moments later looking less ridiculous, but just looking at him makes my own nose hurt. His nose is swollen and starting to bruise.

"Dammit." I mutter under my breath before ordering, "You. Follow me. No asking questions."

I lead the way to the kitchen and grab a plastic sandwich bag, two paper towels, and head to the freezer. In no time I have a makeshift icepack that I hand to the idiot. And, yes, he really is an idiot, because he just stands there looking at me like I've grown another head.

"What? Put the damn thing on your nose before you wind up looking like you've been beat up by someone, dammit."

He places the ice on his nose and winces because of the pressure placed on it, before saying, "Gracias, Lovi," and giving me a million kilowatt smile. How the hell can anyone have a smile that good? Damn. I must be seriously out of it because of sleep deprivation, blood loss, and female hormones.

I decide to distract myself by glancing at the clock. It's almost twelve forty-five. Third period just started back at school. Come to think of it, I'm pretty damn hungry…

I remember the sandwich I packed in my bag and head to the front hall to rummage for my lunch sack. No way in Hell am I letting a tomato go to waste. That could be considered a sin.

Antonio is staring at me from the kitchen door, but comes and fishes through his own bag before pulling out a similar brown paper bag.

"Mind if I join you for lunch, Lovi?"

"That's a stupid ass question. I'm not letting you out of my sight until I have a damn agreement in writing that you won't tell a single damn soul what I told you about me being cursed. So sit your ass down and eat your damn lunch!" I flop into one of the chairs at the kitchen table and pull my sandwich from the bag. "And my name is Lovino, dammit!"

Antonio sits and start to open his bag. I realize that I need a drink and stand back up then head to the refrigerator. I grab a bottle of tomato juice and glare over my shoulder at the Spaniard.

"What do you want to drink, Bastardo? Water, milk, orange juice, tomato juice, or Coke?"

"Ah, tomato juice, if you don't mind."

Heh. He may be an idiot but he has good taste.

I hand the idiot a bottle and sit down to unwrap my sandwich. Out of curiosity, I glance up to see what kind of sandwich he is eating and my mouth opens slightly in shock. There is no way that is what I think it is. It's impossible.

"Er, Lovi? Is something the matter? Err, Lovi? Lovi?" The Spaniard's hand waving in front of my face snaps me out of my trance.

"W-what?" I blink in surprise. Oh. I was zoning out. "Mi dispiaci. But is that what I think it is on your sandwich?"

"Huh? Oh its heirloom tomatoes. Why? Is something wrong?"

"Ah. No. I was just wondering where you got them. Those are hard to find."

Antonio laughs.

"Si. They are hard to find. It took me three years to find the seeds for these."

Did I just hear him right? He said seeds, right?

"You grew those yourself?" I ask quietly. I don't really trust my mouth right now it's watering so much.

"Si. I have a small tomato garden at home. I picked these last night." He takes a bite from his sandwich and sets it back down. I don't realize that I'm still staring at the damn thing until he asks, "Um, Lovi? Do you want to try a bite?"

"Si." The word slips out before I can stop it. "I mean, no, well yes I'd like to try one of those tomatoes, but that's your sandwich and umh…"

My rambling comes to an abrupt stop as half a slice of an heirloom tomato is popped into my mouth and I chew instinctively. Holy shit. It's delicious.

I stare wide eyed at Antonio for at least a minute and a half before my senses return.

"What the HELL? Who just shoves food into someone else's mouth, bastard?!" I can feel my cheeks turning red in a mixture of anger and embarrassment.

"Aw, but Lovi, you looked like you enjoyed it, mi tomate." Antonio chuckles and takes another bite out of his sandwich.

"What did you just call me? How the hell am I a tomato?" I rage at the newest of nicknames from the Spaniard. "And for the last time, my name is LOVINO!"

"Ah it's just that your face started turning red and it was kind of cute…"

"I'm not fucking cute!"

"If you say so, Lovino." he pauses then quickly changes topic, "But you must really like tomatoes. You even have a tomato sandwich yourself. It looks pretty tasty."

He eyes my sandwich with curiosity. I stare right back.

"It's a margherita sandwich. I made it based on the pizza. And why wouldn't I like tomatoes? They are the best fruit on the planet." I state the obvious.

"Si. Tomatoes are delicioso." He takes a drink from his tomato juice and looks at my sandwich again before asking, "Do you want to split lunches? You know 'I'll trade half my sandwich for half of yours'? That kind of deal?"

'Why the hell would I want to share my lunch with this bastard?' I think to myself. But then I catch sight of those rare, delicious, purple heirloom tomatoes again.

"Fine. Hang on just a second, bastard." I walk to the sink and fish a knife from the dish drainer. I return to the table and carefully slice my sandwich in half, well close to half. The side I'm keeping for myself is a tiny bit larger, I'm sure of it. I hand over the smaller sandwich and the knife and watch as Antonio slices his sandwich. The side with the bite missing is definitely smaller than the other half.

My day just got slightly better. He hands me the larger half! Holy shit! Wait, is he trying to be nice to me? I'm not buying it. There has to be some catch somewhere. But right now, I don't really give a shit. I've got tomatoes to eat!

**A/N: Friendship is necessary before romance. And what better way to start friendship by sharing a mutually delicious lunch. Antonio even got Lovino speak nicely without him even realizing it. Ah. The power that tomatoes have on little Lovi...LOL.**

National Reviews

Me: see Romano, tomatoes. Just like I promised.

Romano: *eating spare margarita sandwich off of plate nearby.* Whatever. This is an okay sandwich I guess.

Me: I'm glad you like it Romano. So don't try to delete my stories any more or you'll accidentally delete the tomatoes in future chapters that are already typed. And that's a lot of tomatoes.

Romano: Fine. I'll let you write about me being a girl temporarily for the sake of those tomatoes. But only for the tomatoes.

Me: So the fact that Spain might wind up with you romantically doesn't matter in the least?

Romano: *blushes vibrant shades of red* o-of c-course not! There's no way that has anything to do with it. I can't stand Spain.

Spain: *walks through door, hears the last sentence, and looks disappointed * Ah I see. I guess you hate me then...

Romano: ah, um I didn't mean it like that, bastard. I meant...um...

Spain: *smiles brightly* ah so you don't hate me!

me: ***smiles slyly at readers*** looks like I'm on to something here...

Coming next chapter: Antonio has a brilliant idea. **Solution? Not!**


	11. Ch 11: Solution? Not!

A/N: Hello Everyone! I would like give a shout out to all of my reviewers so far. So, Thank You,

**ShadowCat17**(wow multiple reviews you're my story stalker :3 ),

**piratespain13**(thank you my amazing beta, and bestie, you keep me on track)

**xXSapphireDawnXx** (aha, you understand my logic about China, but *shh, don't go spreading the word too far or you might wind up spoiler-ing my plot..lol)

**CherryCherri** (I'm glad you like it, I laughed while reading your comment and had to sigh as I realized that, yes, Lovi does have to deal with a lot of shit, I'm so mean to the little Italian)

**Sesi and Siku Braginskaya** (thank you for the note on Russian and Polish names. I have corrected the error. Oh, and be careful while reading this in class, your peers may look at you like you're crazy if you suddenly start laughing randomly. I know this from experience.)

**Greece's kitty **(I love the randomness of your comment.)

**BlueFeatherStar**(glad you like it, I agree cute is one of the word I would choose to describe this fic.)

**YGOfangirl4ever **(more is on the way, don't worry. I'm currently typing chapter 19, so you're good for a while.)

** .750 **and **nicoleforever **(you're both equally appreciated, but I'll respond to both at the same time because the response is the same, and I'm sure that many are ready to kill me for this humongous A/N. Half the time, I can't wait to see what's going to happen in the next chapter myself.)

I'm so totally loving typing this story! And to all my followers, and favoriters, I look forward to you multiplying. And feel free to leave a comment of your own, I love to hear others' opinions on my writing. If you don't want recognition, be anonymous.

Well, enough with the huge note and, after the standard disclaimer, let's get on with the story.

-SeriPhe08

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 11

By the time we finish eating out lunches, The Spanish Bastard is looking more spaced out than usual. It worries me a little bit. I mean, it would suck if the idiot got more stupid from a concussion caused my getting hit with that damn door earlier.

I'm about to say something along the lines of "Hey, stupid, snap out of it," when said _idiota_ suddenly speaks first.

"Hey, Lovi! I just had a great idea! Francis has a friend that might be able to break you curse!"

The idea of meeting with any of the French pervert's friends makes me shiver slightly.

"Who the hell, does that pervert know that can use magic?" I snap.

"Ah, well, actually he goes to our school. I didn't believe that he could actually use magic until he turned Francis into a spotted toad for three days over the summer, though. That was kind of funny though. He had to stay at my house with my box turtles…" Antonio keeps rambling as I make the connections necessary to figure out just who the Frenchy's friend is exactly.

"It wouldn't work." I sigh. "If you're talking about that Eyebrow Bastard, Kirkland at least."

"Huh? How'd you know I was talking about Arthur Kirkland?" he asks. "And why wouldn't he be able to fix your curse."

"Because," I snap, irritated that I'm going to have to explain my curse problem even more. "The stupid ass Brit was the one who cursed me in the first place, and the bastard himself said it was permanent as far as he knew."

"Oh…" Antonio suddenly looks like a deflated balloon. "I thought it would work out."

He suddenly becomes annoyingly peppy again as he speaks again. "But that just means that we'll have to come with another way for you to break the curse! Right?"

"Whatever, bastardo. Just don't let anyone else know about it until you clear it with me first. Capisce?" I growl at him. And I intend to continue snapping at him until I suddenly yawn.

Dammit. My sleep deprivation and everything else, along with the fact that I now have a full stomach are making me fucking tired.

"Lovi. I should probably head home. You look like you're ready to go to sleep. You did say you didn't sleep enough last night." Antonio chirps. His perkiness is getting more annoying by the moment…and I really don't want to argue with the idiot right now.

"Fine. You can go the hell home, but if I find out you told anybody what-so-fucking-ever, I'll make sure that you wind up wishing you were cursed." I will seriously make him regret it. I'm too damn sleepy to write up a real contract. Besides, if I had to sue the bastard, I'd just wind up outing myself as cursed in court, or some other stupid shit. I just hope the _idiota_ takes the hint.

He must have seen something in my glare, because Antonio quickly answers, "I would never tell anybody your secret, Lovi. But I'll seriously work on figuring out a way to fix the curse."

With that he takes off out of the kitchen, has his shoes on and his bag on his shoulder, and is out my front door before I can say anything else.

I stare after him for a minute before I realize that the bastard left his trash on the table for me to clean up.

I toss the paper bags in the trash and the juice bottles in the recycling bin under the kitchen sink before quickly washing the knife and placing it back in the drainer. I grab my shoes and bag from the front door and head to my room.

I look at the shoes in disgust as I remember that they need a proper cleaning in the worst way. I toss them on the floor and quickly wash my hands in the bathroom sink before pulling my laptop out of the desk drawer and pulling up the internet.

After a few minutes, I find the answer of, "Yes. You can wash tennis shoes and sneakers in the washing machine but do not put them in the dryer" and promptly grab the shoes and head for the laundry room downstairs. I toss them in the machine along with detergent and head back upstairs to my room.

I shut down my laptop and flop face down on my bed. I drift off in no time and dream of tomato sandwiches.

**National Reviews**

**England: Why does everyone say I'm friend with that bloody frog?**

**France: eh? But mon ami, we are friends non? (Wraps arms around England)**

**England: (shoves France's arms away and stalks over to SeriPhe) Please reconsider this. I can't handle him.**

**Me: (all smiles) Oh, don't worry England. I don't ship FrUk.**

**England: What is "FrUk"?**

**Me: (shows England M rated FrUk Fan Fic)**

**England: (face going pale)Bloody hell. As long as it doesn't come to this, I'll agree to be considered his colleague. No friends, but I will allow you liberties in this story for supposition.**

**Me: (smiles happily and hugs Iggy) Aww, thanks England! (adds to myself) 'I ship UsUk...hehehe' (watches England walk off blushing from the hug and starts planning USUK companion fic)**

Tune in next week for a chapter from our favorite Spaniard! Coming soon "CH 12: Antonio"


	12. Ch 12: Antonio

A/N: I apologize for the weakness of my ability to write in Antonio's POV. While I can easily channel my inner Romano, Spain is too carefree for me to understand. My natural personality is just much too different. On another note, I noticed that I now have 40 followers for this story. Thank y'all so much! You guys are Prussia level Awesome.

-SeriPhe08

**!Disclaimer!**

**I do not own anything related to Hetalia, or any other works that I may reference in my writings. If I could own any of these characters, Spamano would be a canon storyline…along with many other tasty pairings….!**

**End of Disclaimer**

CHAPTER 12

**ANTONIO'S POV**

After I leave Lovi's house, I head down the street in the direction of my own house. I do pause for a minute to look at the motorcycle parked in the driveway. I wonder which of his parent's it belongs to. It looks cool. I'll have to ask him later.

It only takes me ten minutes to get to my house from Lovi's and as usual for this time of day, the only person home is my Abuelo. When I step through the front door, he glances up from his place on the sofa in the living room and then glances at the clock.

"Ah. Tonio. You're home early, si?" he looks at me for an explanation.

"Si, abuelo, I got sent to the nurse's office at school and she sent me home early."

Abuelo sees my bruised nose and looks at me with a stern face.

"Were you fighting again, Antonio?" he looks disappointed.

"No sir, abuelo." I explain "I wasn't paying attention when I went to the bathroom during Gym class and a door closed in my face." It's pretty close to the truth. So I'm not lying to Abuelo.

"I see. But Antonio, you have gym before lunch, si? What have you been doing until now?" Abuelo raises an eyebrow.

"The boy who walked me to the nurse left early too because he wasn't feeling well. He lives between here and school and he let me stay at his house for lunch and even made me an ice pack for my nose. By the way, I'm going to go check on him tomorrow. I found out that he likes tomatoes, so I'm going to take him some to tell him gracias for the ice pack."

"Si. Well I'm glad that you've got a new friend Antonio. But you really need to pay more attention to the world around you, si? It's not good to run into closing doors." He smiles softly.

"Si, abuelo. But you have to admit that, if I wasn't so clumsy, I wouldn't have made friends with as many people." I laugh. "If I hadn't broken my foot in kindergarten, I wouldn't have met Francis when he had to help me with my wheelchair that time. And, I wouldn't have met Gil if he hadn't nearly run me over with his skateboard. And if I hadn't got hit by that door, I wouldn't have got to hang out with Lovi today. So far, all my bad luck turns into new friends, si?"

Abuelo shoots me with a puzzled look. Then he sighs and smiles. "Antonio. Never lose that positive outlook on life. It has a habit of rubbing off on others. Even grouchy old Abuelos like me."

I chuckle along with Abuelo and head for my room. I grab the little can of turtle pellets from the shelf and head over to my terrarium and aquarium on my desk. I have four amazingly cute turtles; two red sliders and two box turtles.

"_Hola_ Symone, Jose, Myra, and Speedy." the four look up at me as I sprinkle the food in their tanks. Myra and Speedy rustle some of the leaves out of the way to find the perfect piece to munch and Jose makes a splash as he and Myra swim about in their tank "hunting" the little pellets.

"Don't worry, little _amigos_, when I get to the pets store next week, I'll be sure to get you some _delicioso_ freeze dried snacks." I chuckle as my pets quickly finish their meal and look up for seconds.

"_Lo siento_ guys. This container has to last until then too."

I check the temperature and humidity in the tanks and head up to the roof of the house.

My parents bought the house because, even if there's a really small back yard, it has a flat roof that is almost like a giant balcony, or like one of those apartment roofs in the big cities you see on television. There's enough room up here to have a patio set and a small garden. Mama has one half set up like a cute outdoor café and the other half has my garden.

I have my heirloom tomato plants in planters and also some peppers and other small vegetables that taste good. Mama also has a line of flowers around the edge of the roof in long planters. I think she wants it to act as a wall to make sure we don't get too close to the edge and fall off, even if there is an iron railing all the way around the roof. I will admit that I might have not been paying attention while watering my garden one time and accidentally knocked a watering can off the edge… needless to say, Mama had Papi put the planters around the edge within the next week just to be on the safe side…

I finish my gardening and set a dozen of my heirloom tomatoes aside in one of the wicker baskets that Mama keeps in the kitchen. I'll give them to Lovi when I go see him tomorrow. He really liked my sandwich earlier. He had this strange sparkle in his eyes when he was eating it. And he actually blushed when I fed him a piece. It was really cute. Even if he denied that when I told him so.

I'd really like to try my tomatoes on a sandwich like he made, too. I was surprised when he agreed to share lunches with me. I even gave him the bigger half when I sliced it because it made me so happy. There aren't many people I don't get along with, but I like to be there for my best friends. I really enjoy making people smile, too. Lovi had a small smile when I gave him that sandwich. It made my day. Maybe if I give him that basket of tomatoes, he'll share another one of those Margherita sandwiches with me.

Mama and Papi come home around five-thirty and after supper, and Mama scolding me about being more careful, I take a shower and head to bed for the evening. As I drift off to sleep, I think about how happy Lovi will be to see me tomorrow.

**National Reviews:**

**Spain: Ah, Seri~ I think you did okay writing from my point of view, amiga.**

**Romano: Si, bella, You did a wonderful job of capturing his inner idiota. (smirks at Spain). Figures the only reason The Pervert and the Annoying Albino would be his friends is because they had to take care of him...**

**Spain: (whines) Aww Roma~ that was mean... they made friends with me for much better reasons than that...you see...**

**Me: (interrupts quickly) Ah. Thanks Spain. Romano. (sighs) I really think that I could do better though. Maybe my fans can help me improve some with helpful comments in the reviews... ANYWAY! To all my readers,...**

**TUNE IN NEXT WEEK FOR... Chapter 13 : Unwanted Visitor **


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